Sunday, December 13, 2009

xmas time

hmm i think i wanted to give a quick run down of a typical family xmas at mine. what happens is i wake up and look at the little kiddies get their presents, especially my cousin ty who calls me buddy. i love the boy. hes getting so big now and hes starting to get so into motorbikes, he deff didnt get that from me.

ty being a grubby little boy. why are they happiest when they look like no one owns them is beyond me.

anyways, after a long morning of watching kids play with their new stuff, its time to clean and start cooking. im the head of the kitchen at xmas time. the fact is, my family wouldnt know how to prepare a good roast anything. they have no concept of seasoning and as pop like to say "i dont like my cows mooing" meaning anything remotely pink in a meat means it is bad. i suppose that is deff not a part of todays culinary culture, like, i dont think the values of past food practices like the overcooked meat is a good way to prepare anything today and by his standards pink isnt "proper."

so when ive cooked a fuckload (and i am not going to this year) i start drinking! yes, the sickly xmas season makes me want to drink, a lot. i end up drinking till 10pm norm and then pass out. good times. no chilldren in your face, lots of free space to roam around down at home and i can finally confide in my sister or cousin ashleigh about life. i know this xmas will be tough. last xmas abe couldnt call me and he tried so hard. apparently skype hated him on that day last year. it was really horrible not hearing his voice all day. i cried obviously and he managed to get my voicemails of me crying and i think he almost punched a new hole into his laptop bc he couldnt reach me at all. i hope those things are expelled into this blog and dont affect me during this xmas.

i made him a collage for xmas. i asked him what he wanted for xmas and he said he wanted me, so i gave him me in the form of a photo collage haha. he liked it! prob masturbated well that day lol. i hope he did!!!!
get all his energy out in that way. the thought gets me so hot. is that creepy?

anyways, that is xmas for me. i go home, i cook, i see kids open pressies, i drink until i cant feel my body and i get into some random shenanigans. all the while i count it as family bonding.

merry xmas my fellow drunks.


  1. Pants, you are so funny. I loved this walk down memory lane. It's heart breaking to hear you that Abe couldn't call you last xmas day, but at least you now know that he tried so hard.

    I also think it is more than okay to think of being hot for each other. That is such an important part of loving someone. Enjoy what you can!

  2. oh gee i think that is my next post, being horny for a dead guy!

    oh and im sure you can empathise with children being quite happy covered in god knows what. they make me laugh and frstrated at the same time bc you kno it is you that has to hose them off. xmas is all about the bubba's (my fam's slang for baby's)